Day: 20/05/2020

A year on: Graduate school, impostor syndrome, and all that jazz.

This time last year, I was on the phone at work, asking for the entrance exam results for graduate school admissions. At first, I thought I heard it wrong, I had to ask the admissions staff to repeat the exam result to me, and I was told, “See you at the orientation.” That felt unreal. It still felt like it. Now, here I am, in my second semester of graduate school, trying to comply with requirements despite a pandemic, sitting in front of my desk bleary-eyed, trying to think of an objective for a certain topic for a research proposal. Time flies so fast, doesn’t it? But even so, I still couldn’t help feeling that I┬ádon’t deserve to be in graduate school. Yes, even after getting a pretty good grade during the first semester. I still couldn’t help but feel that everything I have achieved is a fluke, that I’m bound to flounder sooner rather than later. I don’t know if I am the only one who feels like that in academia–I sometimes feel like …