All posts filed under: Something personal

004. Tempus fugit.

  Yes, it’s been a month. How time flies! I say this without a trace of irony. Days seem to fly by quickly, and when I say quickly, I mean obscenely fast.  And speaking of time, I’ve spent a lot of time processing what has happened the past month. No one was at fault–and as what I have said previously, it ended the way it did. And even before things ended, I have been obsessing over things that I shouldn’t have. Focusing on these things have made me forget that I have been shutting out other things in my life.

003. February: “Went under a bus, got hit by a train.”

    The love month came in quickly and is leaving just as quickly. And frankly, it’s a relief. Emotions are all over the place, and I wish I could blame it on the hormones. Relationships start, and they end. As much as possible, I avoid talking about my romantic relationships. It’s not a matter of keeping it secret, but rather, it’s something between me and my partner. And to be honest, once people know about it, they will have a lot to say, and far too often, they are unsolicited advice, and in some cases jokes that are part unkind and part something else. A friend jokingly commented, “AFAM, sagot sa kahirapan!” It’s not a funny joke, and never will be. I had to shut that down quickly, as it was an uncalled-for joke. Even if it’s given by people you consider close friends. It was by no means an easy relationship. A long distance one never really is, and I know fully well the kind of commitment it entails. In many cases they …

002. I’ve been sick, and it’s not cute: reflections while in the sickbed and others in between

  Well, hello there. Been pretty ill, and it was not exactly a great sensation. Returning to work felt like having a pair of jelly legs: just feeling wobbly overall. There are times that it felt like my body was in one place and my mind in another. But despite that, I am grateful for the end of each work day, as I get to tick one box for every task accomplished. I have been feeling on edge about something I couldn’t explain, but I am slowly working out through the kinks. Since I have been ill for the most part of the first week of the new year, I have not been able to restart myself where health  (mental and physical) is concerned. Hopefully, I can establish some sort of rhythm: one that’s not so rigid, one that’s a little more forgiving. During my four-day convalescence (I speak as though I am some Victorian maiden wasting away on some mysterious disease), I was able to reflect though. About who I am as a person, …